Has Paula Patton already moved on with Jeremy Renner?

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High school sweethearts Paula Patton and Robin Thicke sent social media into a tail spin when they announced that they’re breaking up last week.  But has Paula already moved on with fellow actor Jeremy Renner (pictured above) The two were spotted backstage at the Spirit Awards last Saturday. The two former co-stars were seen chatting and laughing together before presenting an award, but is this just friendship or has Mrs Thicke already moved on? and is it too soon? For a lot of their fans it came as a big surprise but for months now pictures have been popping up on the internet exposing Thicke’s womanizing ways. Paula was spotted at the Vanity Fair party looking lovely without Robin or her wedding ring. Many are speculating that they will get back together because she hasn’t hired a divorce lawyer yet but only time will tell. In the meantime Robin who’s currently on tour has been pouring out his heart on stage telling his fans that he’s got to get his girl back.

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The hardest thing about being in a relationship is probably trying to decide if you should end it. The second hardest? Whether you should give it another chance — especially if you’ve already broken up. There comes a time in most everyone’s relationship when you think about throwing in the towel. And what if you do, but then your significant other wants you back? What if he promises to change? What if he swears up and down, back and forth, that that thing that tore you apart will never, ever happen again? Do you believe him? Do you risk getting your heart broken all over again?

Before you take him back here are 7 things you should consider first.

What happened to break you up? People break up for all kinds of reasons — everything from an affair to physical or emotional abuse to just not feeling like you have anything in common anymore. There are no right and wrong reasons to breaking up. Everyone has to weigh what works and doesn’t work for them. What you might not be able to stomach anymore, someone else might not see as a big deal. Think hard about what it is that broke you up and whether or not it’s something you can either forgive or live with, because there’s no guarantee that it won’t keep happening.

Why do you want to reunite? Is it mostly because he’s putting so much pressure on you? Or maybe your kids are, or your family is? This needs to be your decision, not anyone else’s. Do you truly still love him and see a future together — or are you just worried about a single income, about being lonely, or about dating again? Consider whether you’d get back together if everything else in your life was going fabulously. If not, then you probably don’t really want him, but just a relationship. Even if it’s not a good one.

Look at the relationship as a whole. Sometimes when a relationship is bad, we end up breaking up over some silly thing  but that was really just the straw that broke the camel’s back. If you’re feeling remorseful because you ended it over a forgotten anniversary or an ex he contacted on Facebook, ask yourself if this is TRULY why you broke up. Chances are, it was much deeper than that. Are you both admitting and confronting what really went wrong as opposed to the “official” reasons for the split?

Is the problem a chronic one? Is what broke you up something that keeps happening? How many chances have you already given your ex? Part of the problem of breaking up is that the ex can suddenly start to make all kinds of promises that whatever problems you have will never EVER happen again. But if they’ve already happened over and over, the reality is that no matter how much your spouse WANTS to change, he may simply not be able to. Psychological forces often dating back to childhood have shaped this person’s habits. Those won’t easily be undone just because he wants them undone.

Can you truly forgive? If you decide to get back together, you can’t be throwing your ex’s transgressions in his face every time you want to win an argument. Not that the problem can never be spoken of again, but it can’t be your go-to.

Be friends first. Try being just friends with your ex first. This way, you can stay close enough to see if his behavior really has changed without sex ratcheting up your attachment and expectations. If he’s unwilling to give it a try again without sex being involved, then he most likely just wants to suck you back into the relationship and has no real intention of changing.

Watch actions, don’t listen to words. No matter how much your ex promises he’ll never touch another drop of booze, or another woman, or will definitely get a job this time, don’t listen to anything. Watch to see how he behaves. Remember it’s his actions in the relationship that will determine everything. And watch for changes BEFORE agreeing to another chance.

For updates on Paula & Robin follow me at @AndreaMBain

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Karma is a bitch, just ask Tori Spelling

Karma is a bitch, Just ask Tori Spelling

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Karma is bitch ladies. We’ve all heard this cliché saying before but it seems like some of us need a refresher on this life lesson. It’s no secret that there are lots of single women out there who have no problem dating a married man. Now us wise ole gals know that this type of bullshit bahaviour comes with really bad karma, but this recent US weekly headline prompted me to go over all the reasons why it’s a bad idea.

Actor Dean Mcdermott was caught in a cheating scandal, again! This time it was with a woman is a 28 year old woman he took up to his hotel room at the Royal York in Toronto for a one night stand, and if this story sounds familiar that’s because 8 years ago McDermott was caught in a similar cheating scandal with his now wife Tori Spelling.

The couple have been married for 7 years and have 4 kids together: Liam 6, Stella 5, Hattie2 and Finn 16 months. If you follow this reality star couple then you know that Spelling, 40 was bed ridden for 4 months with Finn and a month later underwent emergency surgery due to complications from her C section. Now this has nothing to do with her husband cheating, but I thought it was important for you to know this little tidbit of information.

According to US weekly the woman he had the affair with, let’s call her Dingleberry Washington, told the magazine that Dean told her “He and Tori had a sexless marriage” and the best part about that quote is that she believed him and that’s apparently all it takes to get this girl on her back. But to be totally honest I think this girl is a non-muthafuggin factor to their marriage or family, but she does serve as a great example for the rest of us single ladies because I truly believe, “how you get him is how you’ll lose him”.

Allow me to take you back to 2006, does the name Mary Jo Eustace ring a bell? Well she was Dean’s first wife, mother of his 2 oldest children and the woman he cheated on and later divorced to marry Tori Spelling. Dean and Tori met on the set of a tv movie (I think 22 people watched it not including friends and family) and just three weeks later he announced to Mary Jo that he was leaving her for Tori because his words “we’re soul mates, she loves me unconditionally”. That quote is so ironic it actually makes me lol.

At the time of this latest affair Dean was in Toronto promoting the new show he’s hosting, which hopefully will be more successful than that tv movie, because according to the tabloids besides having problems in the bedroom they’re also having money problems. Isn’t marriage great! I’m being sarcastic of course. But it doesn’t take a genius to see that Dean is clearly a “when the cat’s a way the rat will play” type of guy.

Now ladies this is where our behaviour comes into play. If you meet a man and it’s obvious that he’s married no matter what kind of lame excuse he gives you like “I’m not in love with her anymore” I’m just there for the kids or like Dean’s lame story about being in a sexless marriage, walk away from this guy. He is a liar and a loser and no matter how cute, rich or fit he is just know that starting a relationship like this is a HORRIBLE fucking idea. I’ve never met a woman who was ok with being cheated on so as you’re crawling out of your panties to screw this guy just picture yourself 8 years in the future, 4 kids, a C section scar, broke and ask yourself  is this really the guy I want to be with? You may not care about his wife or hell you may even think you’re better than she is but remember this at one point she thought that she was special too and she was on the receiving end of all  his attention and now you’re sleeping on her side of the bed.

I don’t want to call men dogs because it takes 2 to tango but snatching up some other woman’s husband is a foul move and eventually will come back to bite you in the ass, just ask Tori.