Now beware of the conversation ladies it can come up out of no where like when the two of you are lying in bed and all of a sudden he wants to know how many people you’ve slept with. There’s often a number he thinks might be yours, but at the same time, he knows it might be higher or lower. Now if you’re the type of girl who likes to share everything with her man (fool) you should know what he thinks about your number.
Your Number: 1-8
There’s something very endearing about the one to eight zone. A guy may be cautious though if you are in your mid-twenties, or even a bit older; statistically speaking if you’re thirty and he’s the second guy you’ve slept with he may be suspicious. If you’re a bit younger and it’s one, two, or three, the guy likely assumes you had a string of very long-term relationships and that’s about it in the sexual realm. Alternatively, he may think you maintained your virginity for some time and be curious about that. It’s almost intimidating to be guy number two to four. You are easily forgiven any awkward moments in bed, but the guy might actually feel a lot of pressure as you may still be easing into your sexual life or maybe even turned off by your lack experience.
From four to eight he still assumes you’ve been in some long-term relationships but there’s likely a one-night stand in there somewhere, and that’s okay! Eight says this woman has been with other guys, is comfortable but somewhat discerning about hopping into bed, and yet might be willing to settle down with one guy moving forward.
Your Number: 9-15
The nine to fifteen zone is still pretty average in the mind of a man. You probably had a few one-night stands, some short-term flings, and some long-term boyfriends. You’ve run the gamut and know what you want. For the modern woman, anything up to fifteen should not surprise a guy. If your guy is surprised, it’s because his number is likely significantly less and he didn’t expect that. A gentleman that is shocked by a number in this range reveals more about himself then you just did by telling him your number.
Your Number: 16-30
This is where age does become a factor. If you are twenty and have slept with twenty men that says something different to a guy than if you are thirty and have slept with that many. The older you are, the more a man might assume short flings, relationships that went south earlier than expected, and even those guys whose last name may have gotten lost along the way. If you are in your late teens/early twenties and have slept with this many men you might get an eyebrow raise and some questions.
Your Number: 31-50
Now girls this is where your boyfriend might become uncomfortable with your number. One thing that I’ve learned is regardless a man’s age, religious background or profession they are for the most part very judgmental of women with too much sexual experience under her belt. A woman in her late twenties or older may very well have a number in this range. Ladies – don’t be ashamed. If you are in this range it tells a guy that you kissed some frogs. We have too. That’s okay.
Your Number: 51 or more
Ah, the experienced woman. Some men may not like the idea that the woman they have their heart set on has been with this many lovers. Some men might be glad you know what you are doing. There could be guys out there who might gasp if the woman they share a bed with turned out to have slept with more than fifty men. But that’s because they had an idea of how many men you slept with and it was much lower. In these sorts of cases it might be best to get “the talk” out of the way early on if you REALLY feel like you must share this part of your past with him.
At the end of the day, if you have the right chemistry and the sex is incredible, why should it matter how many people you slept with, are you going to kick the person out of bed if their number is too high or too low? I don’t think so. We all have preconceived notions of what our partner was doing before they met us (ideally: sitting on their hands idly waiting) but those expectations are often unrealistic. Our past shapes us in both good and bad ways, so stop asking silly questions, enjoy the sex and don’t forget to wear protection.
The Good The Bad and The Single